Family – Page 7 – Fuel to Flourish™

Quints 3.5

Published on January 26, 2017January 26, 2017 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

Quint 3.5 sounds like a new software program and is indeed a new reality. All in the Vanderwall-Turzy compound would agree that in the last few weeks the V5 have turned the corner. They have made great gains in not only their communication, personal insights, emotional intelligence but their physical aptitude.

Let’s take them one-by-one!

Communication

The V5 represent the spectrum when it comes to communication. When they are not imitating their favorite animals (A Roaring Dino, Hopping Bunny, Squeaking Mouse, Snorting Piggy, and Purring Kitty), they are conversing.

It is my understanding that there are several ways that families can do to promote solid communication skills and a vast vocabulary in their children. These include:

Have Grown-up Conversations with children
Giving them a chance to tell a story
Play Word Games
Listen to how they speak and correct with care. (This has caught on and now the kiddos correct each other with care; Namely Bella and Theo correcting Lily)
Imbed new words in an engaging story or activity

In our house, we celebrate a new letter each week and this provides a foundation for new poly-syllable words and new activities that start with that letter. For example, this week is “S” week so we…

Investigated the differences between sweet, sour and salty.
Allowed Theo to teach us all that he knows about the Solar System.
Explored the United States and who lives where.

img_20170115_075131

Personal Insights

We caught the nasty bug that swept and is sweeping through the Midwest. It appears to nestle into the respiratory tract and morph from virus to the next. This bug altered the kids’ appetites and taste buds for the first time in their young lives. I was blessed to have never had to handle a “picky eating” situation in my home until a few weeks ago. I quickly went to what I share with my families in clinic and I now know that I preach effective strategies such as modeling comfort discarding uneaten food, embracing their feelings/dislike in the moment but also demonstrating surprise and inviting them to choose and prepare the meal or snack. For example, Bella and Ellie were barely finishing any meals so; we would allow them to save the food they didn’t want/like for another meal or snack. When they determined they didn’t like the food, I would say that’s okay but that’s surprising because you really liked it yesterday; half of the time they would remember and finish their green beans. We also have been inviting them to plan and prepare meals with Mom; this has gone over really well.

I am so proud of these new insights and how they are becoming more aware of hunger and satiety cues. Now that they are feeling better, they will stop when they are sensing they have had enough versus stuffing it down like they had in the past.

Emotional Intelligence

What is EI? Emotional intelligence, or Emotional Quotient (EQ), is described as the individualized ability to recognize your own and other’s emotions and to discriminate between the various feeling while using emotion- and managed emotions- to guide thinking and behavior. Now, don’t get me wrong the kiddos are by no means little Dalai Lamas walking around, nor are they gurus in mindfulness, but I have seen great gains in their self-awareness in the last few weeks. They are accurately identifying their feelings and the feelings of others. If they perceive sadness or anger, they respond… usually with a hug. We are still developing skills to work through feelings like anger and anxiety. I’m fairly certain that these will forever be works in progress, or at least they are for me. The instant surges of fear and nervousness or even anger are treacherous waters to navigate for an adult, let alone a three year old.

img_20161223_151247

I have found that modeling healthy EI behaviors and providing a safe space for them to experiment and process their emotions are key. I have also witness the power of exercise and physical activity in emotional wellness. The V-sprouts are much more even-keel when they have moved. It reminds me of keeping a big dog- who loves to run- in a small apartment. If the owner doesn’t seek out opportunities for the dog to use its energy, it will start to cause trouble. It’s the same for my munchkins, if they have pent-up energy- or are bored- they will seek out trouble.

Physical Aptitude

When you are having multiples, especially high order multiples, the risks and warnings concerning physical disabilities and developmental delays are both numerous and alarming. Therefore, the way my children move will be forever a marker of God’s grace and their success in beating the odds. They all got their wheels (learned to walk) around 1 year of age and since then they have been off and running. I remember last summer being amazed at how they took on any and all playground equipment. Now, they’ve taken on water. We started swimming lessons at it is pure joy to watch them bob, swim and splash in the water.

img_20170114_090619

Kali Mae, who OT thought may need therapy due to suspected sensory processing issues, is at home in the water. I love seeing her so happy to move versus struggling. I believe this new mode of transportation is also improving their land motions. I’m eager to see how these gains will play out at the park this summer!

So, what’s next? Well, believe it or not they will be four in a few short months and thus eligible for Sun Prairie’s Four Year Old Kindergarten program. We have been visiting programs, interviewing teachers and comparing and contrasting. They are very excited for this next milestone and we believe it will open a door to a whole new world for all of us!

Under Construction: How Life has Changed

Published on December 4, 2016 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

I was reflecting today on how much life changes when someone becomes a parent and even more so how the change does not stop at child birth; with each stage, the child grows and the parent changes.

At conception, I grew in my passion, responsibility and intent to protect my unborn children. I witnessed a side of me that I had never seen before- the Mama bear. I was keenly aware of the needs of the “fruit of my womb” and there was nothing that was going to stop me in fighting for their lives.

12227740_10105651544112110_555755640716653230_n-1 — Photo Credit: Hayley Painter

At birth, I grew in love, and all that encompasses this word: sacrifice, friendship, and intimacy. I never knew this type of love; the love of a parent for their children. It is this love that grounds all future growth and is the “why” for each and every day.

In infancy, my managerial capabilities were tested; could I pump, feed, bathe, cuddle, console, play and nurture five infants every day? We would see. We did, but not alone, and thus I grew in humility. I had to fight my pride and welcome- and rely- on the help of others. Still to this day, our family is living proof that it takes a village.

In toddlerhood, the challenges shifted to be more mental and psychological than physical. Yes, it can be tiresome to chase around five two-year-olds, but it is more challenging to teach and coach them through their new emotions, experiences and misunderstandings. It is in this stage that I took Daniel Tiger’s advice, “when you feel like you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four.” Between this mantra and my many parenting mishaps, I believe I have learned the value of remaining calm during chaos and calamity… unfortunately knowledge does not translate into skill very easily.

silly-sibs — Photo Credit: Kaitlin Hansen

Today, we are in the preschool era. Being three is so very different than two. At three, children move with ease, can articulate what they are thinking and have a basic understanding of the world that they witness day-in and day-out. They are still naive to everything outside of their four walls but that presents caregivers with a priceless opportunity. Preschoolers are hungry, hungry for knowledge of all of the what, when, where, why and how of this world. It is a true joy to help a youngster navigate a new experience that you know they will remember with smiles in their heart.

Yes, I will not deny there are the threenager moments and mood swings; the “holes” in their oatmeal, the zipper that won’t budge, when they wanted triangles instead of rectangles, or even when all of the bubbles in the bathtub have come and gone. These little things that make the littles steam; it is in these moments that I pray I am able to remain calm and that my peace would transcend their anguish. It is these times that are preparing me for their true teenage years.

At the end of every day, I lie in bed reviewing the day- as I’m sure they do- recalling my good choices and my bad choices. I try to remind myself of the elementary lesson that bad choices don’t make you a bad person, or a bad parent for that matter. We are all under construction… works in progress… building, refining and polishing each other in each moment of everyday and in each stage and we all play a role in this process independent of our age.

vanderwall-28 — Photo Credit: Kaitlin Hansen

Trick, Treat, or Teaching Opportunity

Published on October 28, 2016 by onesource4wellness

Halloween can be a scary time for more reasons than the goblins and spooky ghosts. Halloween seems to kick-off the season of treats beginning with the tempting sweets that line the grocery store aisles. Many parents dread Halloween due to the amount of candy that their child drags home after a long night of trick-or-treating. However, I am looking forward to this teaching opportunity.

Many of you know that food, nutrition and overall wellness are near and dear to my heart. I love equipping and empowering people in their health pursuits… especially my children. Trick-or-treating is a great time to teach moderation. There is a growing body of research that encourages families to mark no food as forbidden. Ellyn Satter encourages parents to help their children to, “Learn to manage sweets and to keep sweets in proportion to the other food [they] eat.” Moderation can be a difficult concept to grasp, but it is a lesson worth learning. According to research, treat-deprived children often end up weighing more later in life due to hoarding forbidden foods. I appreciate these findings but also recognize that these lessons need to be age-appropriate.

At three years young, my kiddos still are led by their frontal lobes (aka Impulsivity) therefore, we have tailored the moderation conversation to one of “wants” versus “needs” and “wants” have a time and a place. Since candy and sweets are unnecessary “wants,” my children have never had any. We don’t have any in the home so, if they encountered a candy bar on the street they wouldn’t know what it is. This is intentional because I know the power of sugar and I also know the consequences. Sugar is a sweet and silent killer that is a great contributor of morbidity and mortality around the world. Because of this I often associate excess sugar with excess alcohol or even smoking. As parents, we are guides and guardians for our children. We are blessed with the opportunity to guard their hearts, minds, bodies and souls until they are able to “digest” the media and message and then tasked with helping to guide them through this muddy world.

This does not mean my children will never have the pleasure of candy; recall those that are deprived often become the secret hoarders. Instead, we will continue to be intentional about when, where, why and how we introduce these types of foods and experiences. I also feel led to set others up for success that is why we will continue to be the weirdo house on the street that does not handout candy, but rather an allergen free snack. There are also a host of other food and non-food alternatives including…

Non-Food Alternatives:

Stickers
Glow sticks
Play dough
Rings
Toothpaste/Floss/Toothbrush
Pencil/Erasers
Seasonal Post-it’s
Bubbles

Food Alternatives:

Gum
Granola Bars
Pretzels/Crackers
Popcorn or Puffed Corn

So, with moderation in mind may the force be with you as we forge into the season of sweets and continue to guard and guide our children in the days to come!

Taking on Three

Published on September 17, 2016 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

The V5 have fully embraced being three! They love being “big” kids who can pick out their own clothes and dress themselves, go potty on their own, take on any playground equipment mom will let them and enjoy new foods, which were previously no-go’s due to fears of choking. I believe my favorite part of them being three is watching their imaginations grow! They are finally learning how to engage with one another in thoughtful and dramatic play. Some days… okay most days… it is tug of war and a battle of wills, but there are moments when I catch them caring for one another, using nice words, and even complimenting each other.

Their favorite play time activities include whipping up their favorite meals in their play kitchen, taking care of their dear stuffed animals, running pretend errands to the grocery store, heading to work or church, the doctor’s office and even tournaments (like Daddy). Outdoors they enjoy going to local parks, swinging on their play set, hunting for caterpillars, gardening (or picking unripened fruit) and playing in the sand.

They also are growing like never before. They love discovering which new ledges they can reach, how fast they can run from point A to point B and now which doors and windows they can open. It is a new challenge to stay one step ahead of this gang. Our best “red flag” that danger is impending is silence.

The girls’ hair also was growing so fast and so long that we took them for their first haircuts. They did so well that the stylist thought they were regulars. And, of course, Mr. Theo played “I spy” patiently throughout the salon as he waiting for his four sisters.

Their knowledge of the world, emotions and others is also ever-increasing. I, now, have to agree with many parents when they say that threes are more difficult than two’s. The two-year-old is still learning to navigate the world before them and tantrums can often be the result of simple confusion; I have pity on the two-year-old. The three-year-old, while of course still learning, knows their world better, knows what they want, and knows each and every strategy to get it, or at least try to get it; I do not pity the three-year-old. I also am now a firm-believer in threenagers; they’re real and they’re nasty.

I can’t say it better than the Huffington Post’s Top 10 Signs You Are Living with a Threenager

You live in constant fear of how to cut the shape of their toast. Do they want triangles today, rectangles, squares? And when they do tell you, they change their mind right after you cut it.
They say things like (with hands firmly placed on hips), “I don’t want to. I want to do what I want to do!”
You go through three or more wardrobe changes a day.
Your child goes boneless the second you remind them that a transition is coming, especially when they are asked to stop playing. By the way, when was this ability given to children? You know, lay limp and double your body weight so mom can’t move you. It’s a talent reminiscent of a possum playing dead…
They run away from you when it’s time to get dressed, or undressed, or do anything they deem unnecessary. In fact running away from you is their favorite activity. (Cardio workout?)
To nap or not to nap, that is the question. A threenager’s answer will always be emphatically “NO!”
They want three (or more) of everything because they are three.
Threenagers do not possess patience.
You have to leave a 10 minute buffer on any activity so they can it all on by their “OWN SELF!”
You realize they’ll be a great trial lawyer one day when they’ve just negotiated their way out of a time-out.

I won’t miss the drama of the threenager years, but I know I will miss the sweet cuddles, sincere naivete, and their expressions when trying something for the first time.

Looking Back at Kali Mae

Published on August 19, 2016August 18, 2016 by onesource4wellness

Kali Mae is the most compassionate quint. She has a sixth sense for the needs of others and truly enjoys caring for her brother and sisters. She also has a special place for animals in her heart. She loves Papa’s dog, Holly, and enjoys going to the local petting farm to see all of the “cute” animals.

K-Mae is our little firecracker and the queen of temper-tantrums. It doesn’t take much to lay Kali out on the floor and send out that shrill, monkey screech. Her cure is typically an outlet for her anguish (stomping her feet, talking it out, etc.) or simple reassurance that it is okay to be angry. She is also the human emoji and has a collection of facial expressions for every occasion.

Kali’s name has ebbed and flowed over the years, but has settled on the originally Kali Mae. She enjoys a variety of nick names, including K, K-Mae and Mae. But, when asked what her name is, she now replies Kali Mae.

Kali has many loves, but the following are her favorites…

Her Favorite Animal: Piggy

Her Favorite Stuffed Animal: Piggy Pancake (featured in If You Give a Pig a Pancake), but you will also find her Moose (If You Give a Moose a Muffin), Minnie Mouse and Yellow Bears tucked in her bed with her.

Her Favorite Animated Character: Peppa Pig

Her Favorite Show: Super Simple Turn and Learn ABC’s

Her Favorite Food: Anything sweet, but in all honesty she’s enjoys everything

Her Favorite Activity: Gardening

Now, here’s a look back at Kali Mae’s second year…

Kali at two years…

If you really want to turn back the clock, check out Kali’s First Year…

Looking Back at Isabella Marie

Published on August 17, 2016August 18, 2016 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

Isabella Marie is three! As we look back and ahead at our Bella-Bean, it is clear that Bella is the most creative, artistic and imaginative among the five. She can entertain herself for hours with intricate story lines. She is a social butterfly, but truly enjoys her alone time.

Bella also appreciates order; “A place for everything and everything in its place” truly describes Bella’s space. Her room may appear to be a mess, but it is perfectly imperfect in her eyes.

She also appears to be the “popular” girl among the V5 and tends to rule the roost. The only card that will trump Bella is Theo; He has a special place in her heart of hearts. Also, since Bella (Felix) and K-Mae (Oscar) have been rooming together they also have become besties. It warms our heart to see them playing hand-in-hand and caring for one another’s needs.

Bella is the opposite of “even keel” and often unpredictable in mood, opinion and action. It’s also difficult to pin her favorites but we’ll try!

Her Favorite Animal: Seal

Her Favorite Stuffed Animal: Truly her Fuzzy blanket or Her Ginormous Brown Bear

Her Favorite Animated Character: Lambie from Doc McStuffins

Her Favorite Show: Doc McStuffins

Her Favorite Food: Avocado

Her Favorite Activity: Snuggling on Daddy’s lap

Now, here’s a look back at Isabella’s second year…

Bella’s at two years…

If you really want to turn back the clock, check out Bella’s First Year…

Looking Back at Theodore Joseph

Published on August 17, 2016 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

Another year has passed and it is time to take a look back at each one of the Vanderwall-5. Starting with big brother, Mr. Theodore Joseph!

Mr. Theo is the most well-spoken, genuine and loving three-year-old. His brilliance and considerate-nature often leave me speechless. If he catches you staring off into space, he will kindly ask you what you are thinking about with honest interest. The little guy is truly a sponge; you only have to tell him once and he will remember it. He also enjoys quizzing others to be sure they know, too. It is adorable to catch him teaching his sisters- not only- their abcs and phonics, but all manners.

He is an even keel little fellow, but when he gets excited watch out he will transform into a T-Rex (Theo Rex)! His favorites have also remained the same over the years.

His Favorite Animal: Dog

His Favorite Stuffed Animal: Brown Bear

His Favorite Animated Character: Thomas the Tank Engine

His Favorite Shows: Super Simple ABC’s and Blues Clues “Alphabet Train”

His Favorite Food: Anything and Everything, but don’t stand between Theo and his veggies with hummus

His Favorite Activity: Snuggling while reading a book

Now, here’s a look back at Theo’s second year…

Theo at Two Years…

If you really want to turn back the clock, check out Theo’s First Year…

Summer Fun

Published on August 14, 2016 by onesource4wellness1 Comment

The summer of 2016 has been a blast! It still amazes me how much children grow up between the ages of two and three; too many milestones to count. At two years… I was so fearful if I caught them climbing, running, and jumping and now at three years, I want them to climb, run and jump! This summer the V5 have had ample opportunity to do so, too! We have explored local dream parks, splash pads, played polar bear plunge in our mini pool and slip and slide, hit up the zoo, farms and bounce on every bouncy house in sight. Not to mention… turning three, moving to “big kid” beds and receiving their very own “park” (aka play house). The kiddos even go to attend their first wedding!

They soak it all in just like the rays of sunshine. It is amazing what they recall from months ago… down to the color socks they wore when we went to the zoo the last time.

I had to capture these precious memories…here’s to many more!

13872922_10106570440551280_8134277952180451068_n

13686632_10106570440321740_1046671872659767449_n

13906825_10106600392926480_6750242828737008193_n

Turning the Corner

Published on July 23, 2016 by onesource4wellness2 Comments

Time continues to roll by; days turn into weeks, weeks into months and now months are quickly turning into years. At some point in the last few months, the V5 turned the corner. One evening, they went to bed little squirmy wormy caterpillars and woke up beautiful butterflies. We have truly witnessed our babies’ metamorphosis into little people.

13533348_10106432333399120_8359470402266098812_n

They are verbal and becoming more articulate; all can mumble through the ABC’s. Their coloring and writing skills are becoming more and more impressive; all can spell their names. Most often you have to rearrange a few letters but they’re all on the paper. They are becoming more independent with each day; all are day-potty trained. They are scary-mobile. I recall keeping them down off high equipment at the park and back from ledges knowing that their little bodies would keep them from doing what their minds were determined to do. But, now, now I just wince a bit as they jump from here to there, or climb as high as they feel comfortable and run as quickly as their legs will carry them. It’s amazing.

My favorite marker of growth, however, is the growth of their imagination. I love watching my children use their creative minds to make up games, stories and scenarios as they either play alone or with each other (rarity, but it does happen). Most of the time you’ll find…

Theo having some “boy-time” playing with his orange lam-bor-ghini and green tractor, heading off to Farm and Fleet.

13494869_10106431982507310_1935529450440674335_n

Bella playing dress-up and hurrying off to church, the grocery store or the eye doctors. She has the most elaborate imagination and will keep herself busy in her creative world for hours if we let her.

13502540_10106431974169020_5203421400384213368_o

Lily typically hovers around any and all of her siblings, wanting to play along or simply snatch the toy their playing with. It’s not malicious, only devious. She’s a little troublemaker. Her favorite scenarios these days are caring for her little koala (Uti) or mouse (Mousie) and helping them learn how to use the potty.

13483031_10106431975406540_4211438659431035852_o

K-Mae loves to write, draw and color. You’ll find her at the blue table writing her name, drawing shapes or coloring little yellow bears and piggies. When she’s not practicing her penmanship, she’ll be running around with Bella. Since those two became roomies a few months ago, they have been nearly inseparable.

13490793_10106431973545270_5705664832231749995_o

Ellie is a mover and a shaker. All of her imaginative play is as active as it can be. Her favorite games to play are “obst-cle” course and “bouncy house” where we rearrange the couch to be a huge square for her to bounce around in. It was a real treat when the Whitakers’ borrowed us their real bouncy house.

https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2F1942380%2Fvideos%2F10106535459553480%2F&show_text=0&width=560
When Rosie is all tuckered out, you will also find her snuggled up with her entourage of stuffed kitties and a pink blanket.

13497527_10106431974363630_2438658391672765400_o

It is ever so hard to believe that they will be three years old in two weeks. The transition from toddlerhood has been real physically, emotionally and socially. We have truly watched them turn the corner and are now excited to watch them head down the road to new knowledge, skills and adventures.

13497931_10106431973944470_7487969179227868027_o

Bouncing into Spring

Published on March 22, 2016 by onesource4wellness

Spring is an amazing time of new beginnings, shedding of winter’s layers and welcoming new life. The V5 are enjoying every minute of exploring our new backyard, the neighborhood and all of the flowers and plants starting to poke their heads from the ground.

We formally welcomed Spring at the Madison Area Mom’s of Multiples Spring Fling. The kids had a blast at the Open Gym with all of the trampolines, mats, parallel bars, obstacle courses and toys. We now adoringly call the open gym, the Bouncy House. We, however, picked up a nasty bug at the event and riding on the fun memories, giggles and smiles that we shared last weekend to carry us through. Here are a few of our faves…