September is a month of transition. New school routines, fall sports and activities which can lead to an exhausting day and it is easy to go through the motions from wake-up to bed-time. Despite the busyness, we don’t want to sacrifice the quality of our time together and how precious these moments are.
We have been counting down to the first day of first grade since June because our crew are social animals. They thrive at school. It was evident by the last week in August that they had grown tired of their familial playmates. This first week of school has been a blast. Each kiddo has enjoyed the adventure of learning their new routine, teacher and classmates. Lucky for them, they were exposed to the entire Kindergarten class last year so the experiences was truly a shuffle of each others’ friends and an opportunity to be-friend their siblings’ besties.
All are looking forward to reading more often and with greater confidence, writing with greater clarity and expressing their creativity in art, science and music. We are ready to watch our little miracles continue to grow by leaps and bounds in first grade.
Where do I start with Ms. Elliott Rose? She is simply intense. Everything she does, she does to the extreme. When she is happy, she’s incredibly happy. When she is sad, she’s very sad. When she’s mad, Ellie goes boom! She is truly a feeler. I can see that she can sense others’ hurt and pain and it melts my heart to watch her respond in kindness. This is definitely true for our furry and feathered friends, too.
Rosie is also our athlete who continues to love to move. Her favorites our gymnastics, tumbling, soccer and soon will be trying her hand at cheer. At the end of the day, when she has run out of gas, she is always excited to snuggle up.
Now, a look back at Ellie over the last year…
Ellie at five years…
Ellie at four years…
Ellie at three years…
Ellie at two years…
If you really want to turn back the clock, check out Ellie’s First Year…
Kali is quick-witted and kind with a very active mind. She is just as sweet as she is sassy. She is our observer and -like her brother- has a photographic memory that never forgets. Kali continues to love to be helpful, take care of everything from plants to people and still wants to live on a pig farm when she grows up.
She loves to chat about her weekly boyfriends but her heart truly belongs to Minnie Mouse (Thank goodness!).
Now, let’s look back at Kali over the last year…
Kali at five years…
Kali at four years…
Kali at three years…
Kali at two years…
If you really want to turn back the clock, check out Kali’s First Year…
Lillian Grace is snuggled right in the middle of the five and I’m certain she wouldn’t have it any other way. Lily continues to be the goofiest of the bunch and knows how to make them all laugh. She also knows just as well how to push their buttons. She has been the “lil-instigator” since day one.
Lily knows how to go with the flow and lives by the YOLO adage, but don’t let her laid back personality fool you. She has a temper and can go from 0 to 60 just about as quick as Ellie Rose. Her storms are easy to calm with a silly face, tickle under the chin or a question for redirection. She loves to play and is by far the most social; everyone Lily meets is a new friend.
Join me as we take a look back at Lily’s last year…
On to big sister Isabella Marie! She is still our petite princess who consistently has an imaginary story line playing through her mind. She continues to love to be artistic whether it is through drawing, coloring, singing or interpretive dance. This sweet girl also loves America, country music and her big brother Theo!
While she is 90% sweet, there is 10% spunky goof ball with a bit of sass; she has renamed this alter ego Izzy. While we are trying to adapt to her new name, she will forever be our Bella Bean.
Birthday week has arrived and it’s time to reminisce and stroll down memory lane. While Mr. Theo has truly grown up, his personality, inquisitive nature and love for tinkering have remained. He has found new loves like baseball, the Chicago Cubs, batting practice with Dad and did I mention baseball?
This last year in Kindergarten he was able to expand his social circle to include some more XY chromosomes and truly enjoyed “boys only” play dates. We also were able to go on a few Mommy-son dates which will forever be in my heart.
Like that. In a blink of an eye. School is out. Summer is on the horizon. It is hard to believe that my last entry here was 4 months ago. It has been a busy 4 months, but a good busy and a memorable busy.
This Spring we continued to grow physically, mentally, emotionally and socially. I have to consistently remind myself they are 5 (and a half). What I think they may be able to handle and navigate, may still be too much. Therefore, Mom is continuing to grow mentally, emotionally and socially, too.
Here’s a snapshot of our fun moments this last Spring…
Our house is loud. Our house is competitive. In our house, choices have consequences. Our has a schedule where there is a time to eat, play, sleep and head here and there. There is no doubt that this environment is stressful. I, the keeper of the schedule know that better than anyone. But, our home is also filled with love, laughter, prayer, gratitude, grace and mercy.
This home’s environment is much different than the one I grew up in but the values remain the same. Because of this I see my children evolving to be different than I was when I was younger. They are more confident, outspoken, expressive. They have to share everything from their bedroom to their time. None of this is bad. I just wonder at times what they are thinking and what this experience- this childhood- is really like for them.
There are moments when we find ourselves one-on-one where I catch a glimpse of them with their guard down. Whether it be their soft eyes, gentle smile or genuine laugh, it is then I know that they are doing okay, that they’re going to be okay. Rarely, are there uninterrupted conversations, but now that they can read and write, our conversations have become asynchronous. They can leave us a note, or a picture and we can do the same. It is in these stick figure drawings and scripted words that again I know that they’re going to be okay.
With each passing day they grow up a bit more. They become more independent and more united at the same time. They need others a bit more and us a bit less. While this is hard, I know it is good.
Translation: “Nobody go in this room”
But, I have to consciously combat the worry and the fear that perhaps this environment may perpetuate invisible illness and may pay a toll on their young hearts and minds. Our children, like all others, are developing a sense of mastery of their environment and themselves with each passing day. They can understand reasons for why life is the way it is; these may be logical or magical. I believe it is vital that we, as caregivers, know when to step in and when to step back, in order to foster resilience and not dependency or injury. The following 7 strategies were adapted from the American Psychological Association’s suggestions for fostering resilience across the lifespan.
Strategies to Foster Resilient Families
Make connections. Relationships expose us to another person’s journey which provides us with perspective and increases the skill of empathy. A strong network of friends and family can also provide social support which can provide a non-judgmental safety net when we fall.
Empower through Service. Age-appropriate volunteerism can help the helpless.
Maintain Routine. Most thrive with consistency because it can provide comfort. In times of change, it can be helpful to find rest in celebrating the child’s routine.
While routine and structure are beneficial if they lead to worry, they become counter-productive. Hit the pause button on life to explore with the child the source of worry. If it is the routine, celebrate spontaneity and re-construct the routine together.
Practice and Preach Self-care. Finding and making time to care for one’s self through solid nutrition, exercise and rest is pivotal for keeping one’s tank full; this is a necessity to prevent burn-out especially when caring for a child with any illness- visible or invisible. Children will also bare witness to our self-care and establish their own methods.
Nurture Positivity. Hardship can be handled with greater ease in the context of hope and trusting relationships. Helping a child trust the process, look for the positive and trust themselves to overcome life’s hurdles can build resilience and strengthen their self-efficacy towards present and future difficulties. While children may not be able to assess long-term consequences, we can help them see past the current situation and find hope while exploring optimism amidst fears.
Accept Change. Change can be scary but learning to accept and roll with change at an early age can foster resilience. Navigating opportunities for self-discovery amidst change continues to build into the child and provides a reflective skill-set which can aid in changing with change.
Big picture
Resilient parents raise resilient children who have “the ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change” and find calm amidst chaos. This ability to bounce back and grow is not just a process for self-development but a philosophy. We have the opportunity to plant “seeds of strength” and self-care so, our children can overcome the challenges of illness, a busy household, and/or hardships at home, work and school to courageously take on life with grace, generosity and gratitude.
Advent, or arrival, of the New Year has come! In the Christian tradition the first Sunday of Advent marks the New Year as individuals prepare for the coming of the Redeemer. Each Sunday of the Advent seasons prepares one with focus hope, peace, joy and love. Meditation on each of these values is a solid way to bring calm to one of the busiest times of the year but also sets the stage for the traditional New Year resolutions.
Now, looking back at the last 3 months of the holiday season I cannot help but see memories of hopeful children as they wrote and re-wrote and attempted to re-write their Christmas lists for a third time on Christmas eve… I hear the quiet and stillness of the household once they are all tucked in dreaming of tomorrow’s wishes… I see the joy written all over their faces as they embarked on new adventures trick-or-treating in October, trying new foods at Thanksgiving, and visiting family and friends over the Christmas celebrations… I feel and relish in the loving memories made at Christmas service as I watched each hold their own candle and sing silent night. All of these thoughts seem so fresh and I hope to keep them this way as we head into 2019.
Join me in refreshing the Advent New Year and refocusing on hope, peace, joy and love in 2019!
Minnie (Kali), Anna (Bella), Cat woman (Ellie), Capn America (Theo) and our resident Wiggly Gal (Lily) ready for some serious trick or treating!Visit to the Sun Prairie Fire Department to see Trucks, Police vehicles and the Med Flight team.
Celebrated Kali’s first Winter Dance performance and Lily and Ellie’s first session of Gymnastics. Theo is very excited to start basketball in 1 week.
Bella continues to enjoy her free time to be creative.
Thanksgiving Love, Joy, Snuggles and Sillies!
Family Christmas celebrations abounded! Great lessons of gratitude versus greed were learned. Lots of thank yous for the blessings that family and friends shared.
I even think they learned to like each other a bit more.
We capped off winter break with a surprise trip to the Dells!
The kiddos loved the waterpark, indoor amusement park and the arcade…
especially when Daddy won them each a ball from the claw machine!
We welcomed 2019 in with thoughtful reflection and resolutions, as well as, a whole lot of noisemakers!
Get better at building everything from Legos to planes to robots (Theo),
Playing nice with Lily (Bella),
Practice reading and gymnastics to get better each time (Lily),
Be more grateful (Kali),
Perfect her cartwheel and learn how to do a handstand (Ellie), and
To slow down enough in each moment to Selah, or to pause, reflect, look upwards, inwards and outwards before moving ahead in hope, peace, joy and love.
Fuel to Flourish™ 